Got the butterfly painting in Costa Rica! Feeling quite proud of myself for finding a painting that A) Looks classy, and B) Compliments my Simpsons Nesting Dolls!
I’ve been in the mood to redecorate our apartment recently, so my next few blogs may just be more on the decorative side as opposed to the hilarious side. I came across the realization that I’ve got to start writing every day, whether it’s this blog, my journal, or graffiti in the bathroom stall while staring at the shoes of the person in the stall next to me and wondering why they aren’t moving or making any sound… Seriously, am I the only person who notices this kind of thing and gets weirded out when you walk into a bathroom stall, think you’re alone, see the shoes of someone next to you… and they’re as quiet as a cat trying to steal your food? Are they secretly wishing I would go away so they could poo in private? Are they on their iPhone so they can creepily record the sounds that other people make in the bathroom? Or are they just texting with their phone on silent so they don’t disturb anyone?
On that note, if YOU’RE one of those too quiet people in the bathroom… please feel free to leave a comment and let the world know what you’re doing in the bathroom! Because right now you’re like a scornful woman holding back… the silence is worse than the mystery.
Anyway, I was writing about inspiration! I’m going to focus my blog on things that make me happy to write about without scrutinizing how hilarious or well-worded they are… at least for a little while. I want the blog to be entertaining – but something about the way I’ve been approaching it made me feel unmotivated to write. So for now I’ll treat this like an e-journal (as opposed to thinking, ‘Gee, it’d be great if this went viral right freaking now!’) and see if that increases the inspiration. :-D
On a designer’s note – my friend gave me a sword recently! I love it and want to display it above my fireplace… but if I display a sword without knowing how to properly use it, does that make me samurai poser? I like to have a certain connection with things before displaying them… So if I show it off without knowing anything about swords, I think it’ll feel like the equivalent of buying a bunch of trophies from Goodwill, displaying them inside a glass mantle, and claiming to be a 1st place ice skater, professional boxer, and proud participant of the 1995 science fair.
When I continued over-thinking my thought-experiment, I imagined a burglar breaking into my apartment, seeing the sword, seeing that I’m too scared to use it… and taking off his black ski mask so he can laugh at me. He doesn’t use the sword against me (because in my imagination burglars are equally afraid of swords… They might have a pistol, but they certainly don’t want to risk getting stabbed.) In my imagination, he simply takes a minute to laugh at me before robbing the place. Like if that horrible dog from Duck Hunt was a burglar.
It reminds me of my old roommate from Irvine, CA. When I walked into our apartment I was initially really impressed by his decorating skills. I thought, “For someone who’s consistently drunk, high and clogging up the toilet… he has great taste in art!” And then one day I walked inside Ikea… and I realized that our kitchen and living room looked like an Ikea diorama. Everything from the tables, paintings, plates, and entertainment center were all from Ikea. At that moment I understood that Ikea exists solely to make bachelors appear like they have refined taste. It’s like the cake… it’s a lie.
This got me thinking that apparently I’m the perfect Ikea demographic because I thought the place looked awesome. It never even occurred for me to ask my roommate, “So what inspired you to get that piece of abstract art?” I’d be so disappointment if he responded, “It was on sale, along with 100 tea candles.” I imagine people feeling the same way about my apartment. “So, you know how to sword fight?” they’ll ask me. Then I’ll say, “No, swords are actually kind of awkward to hold… And it’s heavy. But I like the concept of stabbing things.”
In conclusion, if anything is to be learned from this entry, I think I ask “why?” too much… to the extent that I won’t do things (like finish decorating my apartment, or hey, write a blog! I think I’ll just hang the darn sword already… and hit ‘publish.’ ;-)
